Thursday, December 31, 2009

a day in 2009

yes i've been busy. my F**king internet is down at home. and i've got a new hobby :) and it's HIM.

I'm officially 3/4 in a relationship..ok make that 1/2....oh god!

Is it normal for people to get cold feet just to be in a relationship???

word of advise: prolly not a good idea to tell your over-protective-capable-of-killing-people-who-hurt-you kinda family everything about your would-be/might-be bf.
If you aren't having cold feet d, they'll make you have one!.

But that's the reason you love them ;)

Can't wait for Sunday.

xoxoxo
Is it just me or 2010 just looks like it's gonna be an awesome year?

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

blaque & white

I just met a client who is of the same age as me. As i'm sitting in front of her, lookin into her eyes and trying to make sense of the pain and suffering that they have witnessed all these years, i can't help feeling sorry for all the things she could have been. if only...

Her parents separated and she was forced to stay with a relative who stopped her from going to school and made her do all the house hold chores while their own kids went to school. Typical Cinderella-syndrome.

And just as easily as that, i could have been her. Memories of my parents getting a divorce keeps flooding back to me and it must be the sign of what a good parent my mom is that i never once felt the pain and negative reactions of a broken family.

Divorces are ugly. I see that NOW. Especially when parents let their children suffer as a result of their choices. I'm grateful that i wasn't subjected to that.

And i'm thankful that i came out great and with my emotions and self worth intact. Not forgetting the memorable and eventful journey i've had growing up.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Like seriously?!

I'm a thinker. I guess I've always been. I micro analyze everything whether its boys or toys. And very so often i find my self not living the moment but contemplating the future that will be shaped by the choices i make today.

I Always thought that when you're meant to be with someone, the first time you meet them, its gonna be magic. Then it progresses. But really, there's no evidence for this (besides the media). Think about it, does everyone feel magic when they meet the person that, leave alone getting married, they wanna date? No they probably don't. But still, we. I. don't progress with people coz it just doesn't feel right. So much so that i'm unclear of whether the prob's in me or them.

I guess my real prob is the dating system here. We don't date, get to know and THEN fall in love. It happens backwards. And i x like that. How do you fall for someone without knowing them?? If i wanna get to know them and don't like what i find out, it's my fault as well. Like seriously!! WTH? If i just date without actually being in love, I'm perceived as cheap. Or worst, the guy thinks i'm playing him out. I don't get them to buy me dinners or expensive gifts coz I am in fact truly financially independant . But still i guess some people might think it's wrong.

at the end of the day I just wanna have fun and seriously i don't give a shit anymore. If that makes me cheap. Then maybe i am. So...?

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

random

Yesterday the interview was aired!

and that was scarier than the interview!but all was good, my MOM is a celebrity now (yea i knw!) she got more calls than me.. but that's probably because how many of my friends would watch the tamil news anyway???

today is another day at work, and i have piles and piles of case reports to write and annual gathering is this weekend, plus Ivy's X-mas party next weekend AND i want to make time for my friends, those around and those who just came back from diff parts of the world. Sigh! So much to do, So little time and only ONE me.

Digi has something against me. It's official! I keep getting my cdt cut way too much even if it's FnF. WTH?!!

i wanna watch couple's retreat, new moon and ninja assassin. Any takers??

I'm smelling christmas in the air ppl. Gosh! i love this time of the year =))and i've just been made secret santa for our christmas party. any ideas ppl?

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Proud Thursday

it was a very wet and gloomy morning while i was driving to work

(not to mention *boleh-mati* kinda jam)

Now its Almost 1 and my spirits are up

not coz its almost lunch,

BUT coz *ahem*

I just gave an interview with a RTM tamil news-person (say what!)

My tamil was.....ok la

and i din use any obscene direct translation *like i did during practice sessions with the coleagues- and caused them to ROFL!*

for that alone, i deserve a BIG BIG BIG pat on the back.

sungguh bangga rasanya =)))

Happy thursday ppl!

Thursday, November 26, 2009

ticking away

i can feel it

right there in the middle of me

waiting to come out

i may not look it, No

But i feel it

it keeps getting stronger

and stronger

and at any moment

it might explode

i might break

u may be wounded

and still ............,

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

My Life so far

Today was as interesting as any day can get.

1) I almost fainted in the counseling room after listening to a client describe her injuries.
If I'm not mistaken, the word that set off a series of bio-chemical reactions that finally forced me to sit with my head in my hands was "BLOOD".
And like that wasn't bad enough, my client came out and announced, "She (me) pening d after listening to me". And my colleagues laughed and laughed and......LAUGHED!

tom i'm being de-briefed by a psychologist!

2) Aanantha from THR raaga called and since the only other Tamil speaking Social Worker was out to lunch, so guess who's appearing for a 5-min WAO-promoting stint on air?

Nervousness giler!

3) I agreed to emcee for the Annual Gathering (WTH!) i'll be fine now, wait till the day, i'll b a bag of nerves!

4) Me with my BIG mouth, told my colleague that i would like to do presentations and talks, without knowing there's one on thurs. Now, i might have to do that talk.
so soon!!

5) Lots of she says, s(he) says down in the shelter and nobody seems to be admitting their mistakes. The Result??

Stressed staff and a happy panel psychologist :)

Never a dull moment eh??

Monday, November 16, 2009

Chic & Cute

Last Sunday was the Chic Charity Event in Zouk KL; In aid of Women's Aid Organization.
And so Arrienne, Di and I were there from 11am to 6pm (on a Sunday! i know!)

So yea, we didn't manage to sell much merchandises but what ever we did sell was unexpected sales as well, so all's good =)

The event was actually a bunch of e-boutiques coming off9 to sell their stuff. and we even had S.W.A.G (Stuff.We.All.Get) aka freebies at the entrance and RM5.50 (dies!) burgers near the entrance, plus loud music, chill-to-the-bone air conditioning and lots of irresponsible lung-cancer causing smoking. In short it was like clubbing minus the dance and make-up plus loads of awesome goodies.

I spent my $$ on a cute baby-tee, a dove-charmed bracelet and a really beautiful peacock feather inspired hairband (such a steal!).


Have i mentioned I'm a sucker for charms? they had 3D snowflakes, cute Santas, Doves, Angels, mistletoe, christmas trees, shells, stars etc.

My peacock feather inspired hairband


my dove charm bracelet:


**On second thoughts, it's too big for my hand, maybe i'll substitute it with my fairy charm and hang this dove in my car. Yup! now all i have to do is get the Chains,Bracelets+Anklet lady to fix it for me.hhhmmmmm**

On a separate note, Uma made me in charge of the gifts for teenage girls(Annual Gathering), and I've decided to get them all earrings :))))))
So yours truly is gonna shop for 30 pairs of dazzling,gorgeous, traffic-stopping earrings soon.

See..., work aint depressing all the time *smiles broadly*

Anyone wanna loan me their Harry Potter set?? Wanna read againnn.

Saturday, November 14, 2009

My Constitution

Yesterday was the Launching of the Bar Council's MyConstitution Campaign. With a row of talented, intellectual, and dare-to-speak-my-mind-kinda speakers it was totally informative, truthful and yea very blunt , frank and totally void of sugar-coating = kick-ass!



It is basically a campaign to educate the public on the importance of the Constitution, Our Constitution and not just what it is, but also what it contains.

We let the politicians feed us their version of the constitution and we follow it blindly.

We let ourselves be governed by a new type of colonialism by our very own.

We signed away our freedom to live and let live.

All these a product of our ignorance.

AND because of our false assumption that the constitution is a document only for law practitioners, we are not bothered that The Malaysian Constitution has gone through 500 amendments in 52 years! (America is still in it's 13th). If we continue to let it happen, it'll soon loose the true spirit in which it was first made by our fore-fathers.

Simply put, the constitution is a legal document that decides the type of country we live in, the powers that the government has and a way to limit that powers.It is (contrary to what we were made to believe) a universal document that does not aim to create a 2-tiered community that we, the people, have been used to.

The Constitution underlines my right to live my life, the way i want to and also allows me to grant my neighbor the same privileges.

Thus, the current campaign by the Bar Council aims at allowing this Document to be accessible and comprehensible to every, EVERY citizen of Malaysia.
yes! This includes the mamak anne, chinese rice uncle, nasi lemak mak cik and also the Mr.,Mrs., Datin. Datuk. etc.

So go Download your copy of the constitution at:


www.perlembagaanku.com

Also be a Fan of the MyConstitution campaign on Facebook or be a Tweet. Links to be found in the Website.



Love your Constitution, Love Malaysia. =)My

Food+Girls+Shopping+Rain

Thursday brought with it the expectation of seeing my girlz again *smiles broadly*

Since i started work i haven't actually been hanging out as much as i would love to, so ...

after lunch in Kausi and waiting for the *heavy* rain to stop, you would think that we would head home. NO! we sent dev back and went window-shopping in Blook!.

and guess what it starts raining heavier than before and we are stuck there, go Mcd la. Eat again, keep pushing the cup to one another for refills (we are all lazy like that (;)

And....,

What else?



then,



Then we wanted a pic of all of us together, got creative and Ta-DA!(after manyyy attempts)



**If you're planning on stabilizing a phone camera on a wobbly handbag, be ready to pose gazillion times till you get a non-retard looking photo of everyone**

bodoh

Do you need proof that sometimes (some) people are just plain stupid?



See the guy on the bike on your far left?

He is looped by tyres.

Not only that, he tries to swerve in and out of afternoon traffic near Taman Paramount.

Mati ok Jugak, If become OKU, anak bini cam mane?????

No Brains la!

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Love you too :)

i love changing my desktop picture at work.
It's always pictures of me, my family or my friends.
Then i saw Uma's desktop, it was really plain with a tiny box.

Me: why so plain?
Uma: look closer

Then i saw it..,
the box had quotes. motivating, heart-warming, feel good quotes.

So i bertekad to get my own quotation desktop picture;

and i found the perfect one for me;
DEFINITELY motivating, heart-warming and feel good
*
*
*
*


awwwwww...cutenesss.
I HEART U ELMO!!
nice kan my desktop *motivating* picture

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

...

I

Tak

Tahu

Nak

Blog

Apa

.

Esok

Masih

Ada

.

Friday, November 6, 2009

Friday the 5th

A friend sent me this today.Since i'm born on MArch 1st; teal is my color (apparently)

TEAL
You are mostly interested in your looks (go ahead make me sound shallow; like everyone else isn't). And have high standards in picking love (explains so many things). You think and make a solution precisely, and hardly make stupid mistakes (yeaa riteee). You like to lead, and is easy for you to make new friends (really???).


Tuan-tuan dan puan-puan, example orang terlalu free pada pagi hari
*my language teachers migt die of stroke if they read this*

Someone's watching "the time traveller's wife" tonight =)
Tidak Boleh Tunggu! :D

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Aduhai!

Choices. Options.

Why do people always say they want more of these? People start up franchises, add pages to their menus, stock up on many, MANY things all based on the belief that people love having choices.

Me?

I completely loathe-macam-nak-mati it.

It's confusing, time-consuming, too much of effort and doesn't even come with a guarantee.

I hate going to Chillies and turning pages after pages of food without knowing what to choose while the waiter taps his notepad impatiently.


I hate going to stores and being handed down a budget to work under; while having gazillion dresses waiting for you to make up your mind.
(not to mention waiting for the line at the dressing room, hoping that the other girl doesn't take the baju you like, dealing with the looks from your bored family; who will eventually swear never to come out with you again, praying the baju will suit your body and your pocket)

I hate walking in Body Shop and being mesmerized with their pelbagai collection while having the nosy salesperson stick to you like your shadow.

you see, the problem is I'm very intuitive; i work on instincts and the Heart. And i truly believe..,

Shopping is like falling in love.

When you see something, You have to have the initial attraction,

You should feel your heart sinking when you leave it in the shop,

then it conquers your thoughts every waking moment, You dream about your future together, The places you'll go, the people you'll meet, who'll admire and stare till their eyes pop out (all while you're still in the mall OR some times after you've left)

Your heart skips when you see it again,

your heart beats faster when you walk towards it to finally make it yours.

All this before someone else snatches it away from you.

You have this connection that only you understand.

When i have TOO- many choices, I get TOO-stressed and end up falling in LOVE with A LOT of stuff ($$$$ issue) OR HATING it all.Either way, I sedih =(

And my mom thinks shopping can be done quick and easy.

Sheesh!

p/s: I still love Shopping and i found my shopping-philosophy twin; Di! The odds people!
the odds!

=_=

Tomorrow will be a sad day for me & shereen.

Tomorrow we will with heavy hearts bury our dreams of seeing Beyonce perform Live (in the near future).

Tomorrow we will return our tickets and wait for the cheque.

Tomorrow we will snap ourselves back to reality; The concert is ........*i can't say it*

Today i sat in the train.

Today i switched on my *hot pink* i-Pod

1> Ave Maria: Beyonce
2> Halo: Beyonce
3> Flaws & All: Beyonce


Me: Okayyyy that's weird. Give it one more song.

4> Dejavu: Beyonce.
5> Irreplaceable: Beyonce

Me: OMG! the Irony of it all. The Universe has a message for me

Today i flip my Pod. The shuffle button is off!=_=

But STILL... the chances of it playing B first!

Sigh!

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Guarantee for life?

*for the umpteenth time*
I love my job. talking to people and making them see the tough-stuff that makes up their core gives me immense satisfaction. It truly does!

But...,
It is also very depressing at times.

At the age i am and I'm guessing most of my friends reading this are, we often look at our world through lilac pink (coz i like it better than rose :P) lenses and dream of a lifetime of love, undying loyalty and the ability to look back in our old age and see a family complete with children, grandchildren and by god's grace, great-grand children all happy and healthy.

Then again,

everyday I'm bombarded with people who once had these same dreams as you and i; being subjected to all kinds of heartache that many of us have only read about. There's no guarantee that the guy who seems to be the love of our life now will remain that guy 20 years, 10 years or even 1 year down the road. If its only the relationship that breaks, it's still fine but more often than not, they lose a big part of themselves,who they are, their identity, their faith in life and what it has to offer, and their beliefs. On top of that they have a string of children to tend to, zero bank balance, no shelter or food. and the guy, well he is off marrying someone else or busy building up his life somewhere. *this is the worst of scenarios*

but there's always the possibility *tiniest as ever as it may be* that this can happen to anyone of us. to me.

and that scares me. it really does.

then again life doesn't come with any guarantees does it?

p/s: I sat one seat away from MarinaM at a Bar Council seminar. And IvyJ (my Boss) introduced us; hands and all. I kept a straight-face throughout and after we were seated i was like ZOMG!!! to Di (my colleague) :D

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Better hope it's in English

it's 8.35 am in the morning.

I just walked 15 minutes through unkept backyards, downhill between concrete walls, crossed a road, walked a long (LONG!) stretch of houses, thought i was gonna be chased by 4 stray dogs (who were minding their business, fumbled with the office keys and finally! sitting at my desk, alone in this office of 7;listening to Miley Cyrus-Climb, hhhmmm.... how very appropriate.

I need my green tea.

My feet is sore. Damn them white shoes!

I'm thinking if a resident has given birth yet (she had contractions while i was still around, last night...YIKES!)

I'm wondering where on earth Sungai Besi is and how totally uncool (AND UNsexy) is it to tell people "I'm from Parit Buntar" LMAO!!!God bless parit-buntarians :P

It's Halloween this Sat. Anyone have plans that don't involve me going out to get an outfit? wait...did I just say that??

Is my salary in yet?

I have an entire family to shop for. Checklist!

In a while, i'll see the kids jumping up and down outside the office door and i'll know my day has begun ;)

Saturday, October 24, 2009

உப்டடேஸ்!

gosh! after a tiring week and post-diwali fatness, i"m finally blogging again.
Hope u guys had a awesome Diwali, i know mine was =)

I'm officially eating meat again *yaay!!*

I had my first and i would like to think successful child counseling session, and a follow=up as well.

My first adult counseling, which my colleagues teased was more like a gossip session coz the client was vibrant, loud and all willing to share. Interesting personalities i tell u!
Not a day is boring here in the Refuge.

You know we always here of people having weird name spellings because the JPN or Hospital staff misspelled it, well news flash: apparently they can even miss-look *wait for it* GENDER! WTHHHH???!!

Sheesh! Malaysia 'memang' Boleh la!

Fri nite was spent in Zouk. Vinod's 24th Birthday. Finally after so long was clubbing again, but music sucked. Company was good tho, and of coz it was a friend's birthday..So mesti go kan.



Even met some new friends, Jan, Sandra and Meghaa (whose not in the pics...sowie)


while Vinod entertained guests, we entertained ourselves *as usual i knw!* :D

NOW i'm sick :( And tom got conference on Domestic Migrant Workers.
Die!

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Woofie doo

why are there so many cats in malaysia? ok i seriously x care about other parts of the country, but why selangor? why PJ? why Gombak??? WHY???

Today i almost ran over a cat coz it stops when i stop and exactly when i press the accelerator, chooses to run across. Bodoh!

I'm not a cat-hater, i do feel bad when i see any animal being the victim of road-kills or torture, be it cats, dogs, rats and the occasional birds.

But yes! I'm not a cat person and I have tried and tried but I can NOT like them,i'm scared of them, I bloody run from them!!

on the other hand, i'm partial towards these cute lil things..awwwww



One more day of work, then holiday till mon!
Happy Diwali!
=)

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Satu, Dua....Mula

i just finished translating 4 pages of an english report to BM.
Haiz, i didn't think my BM will get that karat
I should watch more Malay movies...Should..Mesti...
........................................
........................................
maybe i'll just speak Malay to everyone.

So,.. aiks, Jadi kawan-kawan cakap la dengan saya dalam bahasa melayu bermula daripada hari ini.

Have a nice Wednesday!

Monday, October 12, 2009

first day at work

And so i had my first day at work..woo-hoo!!

guess who's the friend i have waiting for me on my table,

i'm gonna have to think of a name for him..anyone?

The people at work are really friendly and the kinda go-getter women who can inspire and intimidate at the same time. The moment the kids in the shelter saw me they kept going "It's Uma akka under disguise!" And this name I've been hearing since the interview when i was again compared to this Uma person coz of my appearance. I think she's really good and they keep sending her to do all these talk shows with the tamil channels. So naturally Indians generally call in for her. And my luck, she was on leave today, for the whole week act!

Generally, I wouldn't have had to answer calls from clients on my first day, but there were people calling in for Uma and since i was the only other social worker who could speak tamil, I managed to take two calls :))) the thing was, i had to speak to them in tamil!. Now i can speak tamil here and there, but to actually carry a whole conversation in tamil to people who can't speak anything other than tamil? I was freaking out! but i think i managed fine la, for a first timer.

which explains why i was and still am all smiles till now =D

oh and i have this rock star to keep me happy too,

There's somethin so kick-assy feminine about black bags with gold studs while not being overly girly. i like!

My latest stationary addition,

colorful pens! i've always wanted a set, but couldn't afford the pricey Stabilo ones.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

New Days

Finally it arrived in the mail,
My offer Letter reading,

Dear Ms. Puveshini Rao, you're hired! (the gist la)
I'm now officially an employee of Women's Aid Organisation =))

No more pain-in-the-*youknowwhere* interviews

and to actually work in the organization Sham and I have been talking/fantasizing/discussing (all in our free and boring BM and Sej times); about since we were teeny-boppers is really something i tell you.

To a new beginning,
=)

Quickie

I made a startling discovery about myself last night!
You know how you tend to do some stuff subconsciously and because it's so norm for you, you don't actually realize you're doing it? Well I'm not so lucky anymore, I do realize now...,

I mentally correct (not like there's anything wrong with it) the language in sms while reading it. For Eg. someone says "why did you do that? are u a gay" There's nothing majorly wrong with it, but I want it to sound/look "nicer", so i might correct it to sound "why'd u do that? u gay or sumn?"-in my head! And sometimes I even restructure the whole message!!

Sheesh! The after-effects of having too much free time and the pre-disposition of being a control freak, doesn't go too well does it? And now i read word-for-word rather than just glancing at messages just to make sure I'm not correcting it.



Pizza and breadstix anyone? :)

Couch-Tomato (coz i like it better)

Since 7 this morning, I've heard my stomach rumble non-stop (early dinner-part of a new healthy diet regime; dont ask!), watched a re-run of F.R.I.E.N.D.S & The Nanny, got my dose of gossip from E! News (the only news i watch btw) and the Daily 10 (they are practically the same-minus the countdown bit..ppfff) and an episode of (my favouriteeee) Glow.

Bless E! Channel for the awesome shows that make you feel like kicking yourself for not having the money or facilities to say; have custom-made lipstick colors, nail polish, celeb make-up artist..... or seaweed facial (hey, its good for all skin types!).

And since the death of M.J, the new fuss in town is Khloe Kardahians wedding. As drama-fied as they are, seriously! can people stop calling her a fat slob and expecting her to be as small as her sisters? the woman has gone from a size 12 to a size 6! 25lbs! Hello!! She's tall, so no matter how much she loses weight, she'll be always bigger than her sisters; at least she's healthy (physically and psychologically secure). And what kinda non-sensical morons call people stuff like this on their wedding day? Shame on you magazine people! AND you wonder why eating disorders are on the rise.

FYI! Fat is not an adjective pertaining to size; it's part of the skin structure which often acts as an isulator to shocks and maintains body temperature among others. The term is Over-weight; which means weighing much more than the cut-out point for your structure (in a nutshell); Khloe is NOT over-weight!Have you seen her in the navy blue bikini shoot?


http://forge.evula.net/fc/fc_bulimia_nervosa.gif

Yes I like the KUWTK (They aren't as Diva'ish as Kimora); but I'm not biased, this is just so stupid!

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Salad Bowl

Presenting the:....(I forgot the name). Nvm Yuv says it looks like salad :P
So yea, the salad dress!



I've gottt to get a real job fast!
If not i spend my time shopping. Yikes!

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

read it if you're as bored as me

I'm bored! BORED! BOREDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh..I finally got my Boyfriend-Tee :))
And I found it in Pasar Malam! I totally Love Gombak Pasar Malam la.
Seriously, I saw the same BF -tee in Jusco (Applemints) going for RM79.90,
In E-Boutiques going for RM 35-45.

In Pasar Malam, RM 25 (actually RM30, but if you're mom is like mine, you'll never pay the actual price :P). The quality is good, vibrant colors, great fit, adjustable sleeves, such a STEAL! kan?!!

Now that I've mentioned that, I'm bored again!
haiz!

UPDATE! (for Jade :P)
Pic of the BF-Tee


*belt is excluded*

Friday, October 2, 2009

Sedih

I want the funky owl ring I saw in an online store!

I'm not a big fan of all things owl, but I'll make an exception for this.

But RM25?! for a ring? after getting tix for B! I don't think so.

Haiz!

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

B!

Ta-Da!!



Yep people yours truly, is set to go watch Beyonce rock on stage LIVE in Malaysia!

*Dances*

FYI this will be my first ever concert (yes! very the ketinggalan) BUT what better way to start it than with B!

I'm on natural high at the moment and have been since i got the tix
*looks away dreamily*

Nothin can burst my bubble at the moment (crosses-fingers)

:)))

Ugly Truth

Today I watched "The Ugly Truth". Gerard Butler *drools*

So the movie is about how women are mellow-dramatic, control-freaks who find guys based on a checklist of suitable "traits" (which is wrong btw) and men are visual beings who will be sidetracked by any girl in the skimpiest possible outfit, think only about sex and are driven on lust and apparently incapable (or choose to be) of "seemingly-gay" feelings of L.O.V.E (which based on the movie, is how guys are structured, so girls, accept!).

Forget what i think about it [for a moment ;)]

The Evolutionary Theory (Eagly & Wood, 2002) says that men and women differ psychologically; because of the different social roles they occupy. And due to this inherent differences, they have different things to look for when selecting a partner. While both women and men are interested in physical looks of their partners, since women are often given the role of bearing and nurturing, they tend to have a checklist consisting of "traits" such as socio-economic stability etc to ensure the survival and well-being of their off-springs. Whereas men, are less interested in these "meaningless" tasks and can go on to impregnate women after women on the basis of their lusty nature
(it's not coming from me-blame it on the movie!)

NOTE: Theories are just that..Theories. They aren't proved, but for arguments sake lets just accept it as truth.

So now i'm (here we go! :p) thinking, if women have to accept how men are, why can't men accept women the way they are? It's the same kan? Men want sex, women want security (which often comes in the form of money), We have something they want, and they have something we need. Win-Win! The check-list is merely a memory-aid, even without it physically being represented on paper and ink, we have it etched and drilled in our minds.

And that ladies and gentlemen is ~ZE UGLY TRUTH~ So guys accept that!
Happy Days!

p/s: Be it Indian or Western movies, the guy sleeping around is regarded as funny, adorable, and acceptable even, but the leading ladies are always saving themselves (indirectly) for the leading men. It'll be really refreshing to see a dose of sexual liberty for women without degrading them to being whores or sluts or morally lost. Movie makers take note! ;)

Monday, September 28, 2009

Pins and Shins

I can't for the love of god stand unshaven legs!!

seriously, how hard is it to rub on the waxing cream and have smooth silky legs in a matter of minutes? too long for you? there's always the razor. It's very unflattering and since none of us are Julian Roberts, the "going-natural" thing will NOT work. heck! she gets away without wearing deodorant.

and i understand that sometimes we are just plain lazy to shave or wax. which is totally fine. Then opt for jeans, cargo or stirrups instead of shorts, minies and dresses. If you can't afford to shave your legs its understandable la, but if you can afford an inch of make up everyday then you sure as hell can afford waxing products/ razors.

Last time when I used to take the train often, I see really attractive girls, all polished and groomed till you get to the lower half and you see thick-hair all over their legs- yes! they're in skirts. My heart goes out to them, betul-betul heart-ache tau. and as if that's not enough, others go for pedi and take pictures to post on FB. OK fine. BUT why on earth do you show off the hairy legs as well? It makes the picture look as if a guy went for pedi- a guy with flowers on his toes?- *faints*

Maybe your confidence level is higher than mine, maybe I'm too E!-influenced, maybe that's the new in-thing, maybe it's none of my business...,
WTH! I still DON"T like UNSHAVEN LEGS!


Whats wrong with clean shaven legs?

Pic from Wiki.Images

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Dolled-up

Its 0030 on my K530i and I'm still feeling as full to the brim as I did hours ago.

It all started at 6 something when I was getting ready to go for dinner with a friend. I first decided on wearing a black and red blouse with boot-cut jeans, then i opted for skinny jeans with a blue and cream colored empire waisted blouse, next I thought lose the blouse, and got into a white chiffon blouse with a black clincher. Still, I'm not happy. I get into a navy-blue blouse. No. Revert to first option. Yes.

Then the hair, first all loose, a pony-tail, then a bun, then all loose again this time with moose, up, down, up, down. Down. Now that's settled, make up's a breeze.

So now you think I'm going out on a date kan? Nope. I met Sheryn (who is a girl btw).

Yes I know. I'm weird like that. I have been couped at home so long that I will jump at any opportunity to play dress-up =)

We went to ChatMasala, Brickfields. We ate, Cheese Kofta, Chicken Manchurian (vegetarian of cause) and I had Aloo Paratha (potato stuffed chapathi). As if that wasn't enough, we had to come back to Maduras and have Nescafe. I knew I should have just taken a Dosa or plain ol chapathi. Haiz!

Now i'll just go and read some no-brainer book (read: Mills & Boons) till I can sleep.

p/s: Anyone has the new Dan Brown book? Buzz me.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Wasted Weekend

I'm NOT a car person. So you can imagine how I would have dragged myself to visit a couple of show rooms along Federal Highway with the Uncle, Aunt and automobile-crazy cousin. Sheesh!


The Holy Shrine for car lovers- Big and Small, Old and Young.

and the whole time I'm thinking how many third world countries can feed off this car. :p
Overrated la.

As if that's not enough, we have to walk over the next building and see rows and rows of imported cars. Window-shopping for cars?? I mean if you wanna buy it, I can understand la. Well but who am I to comment? I walk hours to find one dress and after that decide nothing in the whole building is to my liking *shrug*

The best part of the whole car-gazing exercise?

They had food. and not any food, sugary icing-topped butter cupcakes :)

Mmmmmmm...

Laters.

Fish Sauce and Pineapple

The FTB (Forgot-to-blog) & busy weekend when the Uncle was here:

My love for Asian food and hawt! (Red & Black) deco satiated in Vietnam Kitchen =)


My house is gonna have this deco in at least one room..Have i mentioned HOTTT?!

Part of the cam-whoring clan:

The Uncle and Aunt: Take 1


The Uncle and Aunt : Blast from the Past pose; Take 2


My Uncle n Me: Take 1 (and 1 only)

As you can see, my hair is bordering that of a lion's mane, so I shall spare myself the heartache of having it pixelated. No more pics for me. =_=

Uncle n Shaailu: Take 1

guess it's true, the apple doesn't fall far :P

Uncle n Shaailu: Take 2


Food was good, the service.....*explain to me again the rationale of hiring waiters who can't communicate well?*
*hits head*

p/s: Jasbir Sidhu is officially off the list of "orang menganggur". :)))

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Balik Kampung



This song brings back so many memories of balik kampung when i was younger.
I think i like it cause it's so simple and plain but sweet in its own way. I don't have a kampung anymore, but I still feel the same knowing I'm meeting my family after a long time, especially in the hype of forthcoming festivals.

Perjalanan jauh tak ku rasa
Kerna hati ku melonjak sama
Ingin berjumpa sanak saudara
Yang selalu bermain di mata

Nun menghijau gunung ladang dan rimba
Langit nan tinggi bertambah birunya
Deru angin turut sama berlagu
Semuanya bagaikan turut gembira

Balik kampung oh oh…( 3X )
Hati girang
Ho ho… Balik kampung (3X)
Hati girang

Terbayang wajah-wajah yang ku sayang
Satu-satu tersemat di kalbu
Pasti terubat rindu di hati
Menyambut kepulangan ku nanti

Perjalanan jauh tak ku rasa
Kerna hati ku melonjak sama
Ingin berjumpa sanak saudara
Yang selalu bermain di mata

Nun menghijau gunung ladang dan rimba
Langit nan tinggi bertambah birunya
Deru angin turut sama berlagu
Semuanya bagaikan turut gembira

Balik kampung oh oh…( 3X )
Hati girang
Ho ho… Balik kampung (3X)
Hati girang

Terbayang wajah-wajah yang ku sayang
Satu-satu tersemat di kalbu
Pasti terubat rindu di hati
Menyambut kepulangan ku nanti

Sore Heels

My feet is twisted. It is I swear! In some weird angle the muscle is and I feel pain every time i walk. Not so much though, just enough that i can blog about it ;p

This is what happens when you park in One Utama to go to IBM. I parked in One-Utama, NEW WING! and walked and walked and walked all the way across the damn big mall to the end of it...to Old Wing to be exact. and i thought, ok IBM should be here, but I'm not that lucky am I? Go through One World Hotel, then out on the pavement, walking down and a long stretch into IBM.

Finally! But no, it doesn't end there,

There are 2 sets of lifts and the security card I get has a big whooping 8 on it. so I naturally would think it's in the 8th Floor kan? I go in the lift and there isn't an 8! Its not even numerically arranged! I went up then down then up again cause my card doesn't allow me to press any no. I ask someone and she says the 8th floor is on the other set of lifts. Cursing my luck, I walk over the other side, even there the damn card doesn't work. I march over to the security guard and he tells me the place I wanna go to is in the CN Level. What kinda level is that? Sheesh!

Then finally i reach the place and plop down on the cool, black leather couch. Resting my poor poor feet who had to go through it all in HEELS! *sobs*

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

An interview Bimbos would be proud of

What kind of a dumb-wit FORGETS that surgery and chemo therapy are some of the cures for cancer?

I totally knew that!

What did it cause me? Well nothing much,.... just a job interview and some (a LOT of) good-natured advice from the interviewer. Pfft! I was bumming around about it, thanks to the family; i'll be fine

Though I'll be fine, I need some shopping to cheer myself up :)

On a separate note, I'm giving up on Online-boutiques. Why is it that I can't find a decent dress that is at most 1-inch above my knee (not any higher) for Deepavali. Like seriously! I can't be dressed for the clubs at my uncle's Diwali gathering.

Sheesh!

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Karma's a Tough Bitch

Quote of the day: "If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything"
Pasar Malam Tee-shirt

Recently I was called by a friend who told me about a job opening. She went on to ask me if there was anyone I knew who will be interested in in as well, as in any one i know who is also looking for a job. So i gave her the names of couple of friends who came to mind.

Friend: (knowing they are my friends) So you're gonna compete for the same job?
Me: Yea why not? The best person would get it right?
Friend: Yea.


A couple of months ago, my aunt told me to help myself first before helping anyone else. Though she was just looking out for me, the implication of what she said was that " If you know of an opportunity don't tell others until your spot is secured".

I clearly didn't listen to her, I didn't know if I would be secured a job, but I still gave my friends' names in because I know we are all looking for a job and more importantly i know it's the right thing to do. When you think about it, whether I give my friends' names or not, others, strangers i mean would be coming in for interviews too. And there is a chance that they might get the job as well. Now, why would i rather some stranger get the job rather then my own friend? And it seems really sly and cunning to purposely hide something from people whom you care about.

That said I know of friends who have find out of jobs and deliberately kept it from me while they applied or were contemplating to apply for it. Worst is sometimes they are hush-hush about it right in front of you (why whisper in front of people if you don't want them knowing something is up?) Better don't say anything can? :S

When I was in school, stuff like this used to make me really sad cause i felt that things weren't fair. Now, years down, I've learnt that life isn't always fair and you can't always expect people to respond to you in the same way or behave how you want them to. That's the harsh reality of the dog-eat-dog culture industrialization has cultivated. As for me, I've taken my stand in this and what people do or rather don't do doesn't affect me as much anymore. It's sad, but I'll deal with it.
Karma baby, is always fair ;)

Incredible India

Today was a uncharacteristically busy Saturday, Breakfast in Maduras, movie in Brem Mall, Lunch in the Green Curry Shop, Gombak, Coffee at home and Dinner in Sin Kee. Awesome!I'm gonna eat as much as i can before i go on the month vegetarian spree starting on the 17th this month. It's the Navrathri (which literally means 9 nights) festival coinciding with the Prattassi month when people generally observe vegetarianism. It's my first time going a whole month, wish me luck! =)

We went to visit my ex-nanny today. She's really old but still remembers me and kept kissing me while telling me how much I've grown and all. It was really heart warming to be seeing her again, knowing that she can still have good memories of the menace i was back then :p And we were talking about their (her daughter and her) pilgrimage trip to India. It was really amazing the stories they had to tell about the temples and their histories. Hopefully my family's plan of going to India will materialize soon. Can't wait!

Laterz!

Friday, September 11, 2009

Sheesh!

Since I'm on the look-out for a job, I've been keeping myself busy with doing household chores. And I cook more frequently now than I did. There's something about the chopping. crushing. sauteing. that is extremely stress relieving. As much as i love cooking, more than that i love the reactions of friends and family when they seem to be enjoying it.

BUT.... I do not appreciate comments like "you'll be a good housewife", "you can get married now" yada-yada-yada. A simple "It's delicious" will do.

Thank You.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

a day after 090909

10-September-2009

Today is turning out to be really good.

Its Dev's birthday today! Happy 22nd DEVANAND RAJ!
We surprised him with a picnic in Lake Gardens. Was bloody hot and there we( King, Mohan, Izzy & I) were carrying all the stuff cause Ann had to direct a blindfolded Dev.
I was sweating at places that....never mind let's not go there. So the picnic was a small but nice one. King's mee hoon, which he made himself, was reealllllyy good!

Then i come home and make myself chilled Green Tea <3. So refreshing!

I hear from something-good- from Jas which I'm not supposed to reveal till everything is confirmed (which is by tomorrow). So more updates tomorrow :)Hopefully everything works out well.

And in the evening, I'm gonna go temple which I haven't done since last Saturday.
I can't remember nuts from the HRM book I'm reading but I'm gonna try to finish it by today and go over it again ..haiz! and i thought i was through with studying. At least the human mind was an interesting topic. There's something to pray for.

Did you know about squirrel soup? Or Bamboo Rat meat which is edible? Or that Komodo Dragons are poisonous cause they feed on already-dead animals? Or that Bear paw (yes the paws of a bear) can be eaten? That is all the stuff i found out from King while waiting for Ann and the rest (FOR 1 WHOLE HOUR) to come. pretty interesting huh?

Friday, September 4, 2009

My whereabouts

I came to Shah Alam to visit my uncle before he flew back to Qatar, but guess what? the unexpected happened...,



A throat swab is the confirmation test for H1N1!
My Uncle's flight is delayed two days

and the result is NEGATIVE!

=)

my cousin is Influenza A (H1N1) free.

but me? i'm stuck here cause my mom is scared that my sister might fall sick, since SPM trials are going on.

Haiz! So in case you're looking for me, you know where to find me,

Toodles!

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Mowgli & Baloo

Arathy is back from India!! woo-hoo! and the best part? she's not going back!continuing her final years in Penang. Finally she'll be accessible at all times!

Went to Finnegan's for lunch. It was a bit creepy at first cause we were the only ones and the place being a bar and all was dark and gloomy. I realized today that if chicken is the only meat you eat and you don't like fish that much, you might as well be a vegetarian. I flipped the damn menu so many times, till finally i just ordered spaghetti..from set lunch (FYI: RM13) :(

The food wasn't bad though,

*Spaghetti with Salmon strips* (though i doubt it, who sells salmon for less than RM13)?

*Chicken with Orange and hOney*
and the side dishes..that i actually ate,

*pumpkin soup (i din fin it, why..WHY do people like it?) + Tempura Mushrooms (YUM!!)

Then we watched the Proposal, as usual had to find seat in the dark cause:

well....so yea!

The Proposal was so funny! I love Sandra Bullock and absolutely adore Ryan Reynolds, it was the light-hearted romantic comedy-sorta movie that WE have always loved and still do.

Still dizzy from all the laughing, we went to delicious for dessert =)

Cheese Cake with Strawberry Sauce <3
and..

ermmm i forgot what this was called but its some banana + coffee + muffin sorta thing

Overall the day was perfect in every way!

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

go green

I rarely get angry, i'm pretty good at just ignoring or tuning out things that i know will infuriate me, or i'll just go the girls and vent it out. But but but, on the rare occasions that i do get angry, I get angry pretty fast, and cool down in a minute as well. And today was one of those days.

It has been pretty cooling since morning, rain, gloomy and no harsh rays of the sun, my favorite type of whether. =) so i go to fetch my sis from school and had to drop her friend off and go to the supermarket. And i had to follow the route near the primary school (it was 1.10 that time), the place was chaos! kids were actually jumping over the gate to come out, why can't they just open it? beats me. so yea. the kids on one hand, smart baboons who park their car on both sides of the road, plus the cars coming from the opposite direction, and yes people crossing from one side to another in this mess. I just practically parked my car there for at least 15 mins waiting for it to clear. I'm still cool and calm. no road rage there, nope.

then in the supermarket, my sis has to buy this strawberry flavored chiclets-like thing. I'm not a big fan of junk food, never was since i was a kid. I don't take , Coke (and the likes of it),sweets (wait, does chewable Vit-C count?), crackers, keropok lekor etc etc as often as regular people do. Its not cause I'm kiasu about my weight or health, I just don't fancy it that much. ok the sis gets the junk, and i control myself from saying anything, so yea still cool.

Then she gets in the car and feels that the junk is spoiled. So the moment i parked at my house and got out, i see this pink box flying above my head to the shrubs on top of the padang hill in front of my house and rolls down into the drain.

i tell my sis to pick it up, and she is laughing, she's ACTUALLY laughing! She's pleased with herself!!and now i completely loose it! I don't see how civilized people can throw stuff anywhere and whenever they want to? I've seen people unwrap gum and throw the wrapper on the ground where they are standing and walk away. I see it in town, in the train, in the bus and the list goes on.and some, throw stuff out of the car while traveling. its DISGUSTING!! SHeesh!! what? every other place other than your homes are dumping sites???

My sister got an earful but to all the other people who do this, please stop.
Its not sexy nor is it cool AND its not funny!!


Keep our environment clean; you don't wanna live amongst junk and smell crap!

Monday, August 31, 2009

Sub-cravings

I'm craving a sub -sandwich!
I miss Turkey Breast and Ham (my FAV!)though the chicken selections aren't bad too
Parmesan bread + cheese + toasted
plus all the crisp lettuce+ crunchy tomatoes and capsicums + sweet onions + sour pickles + spicy jalepenos (always extra!)
squeeze some teriyaki and chilli sauce

YUMMY!!!

i crave it every once in 2 weeks and very the rajin to use my monthly coupons from my (ahem!) Subway 2009 Calendar. and now since college is out, I cant get my cravings satiated =( it used to be just steps away. Sobs!

its my completely healthy addiction and I'm experiencing withdrawal symptoms now!



HAiz..*drools*

monday blues

First things first, I'm not in the mood for MERDEKA so don't bother wishing me a happy independence day with the widest smiley you can get coz i'm not interested.
I love my country, i just don't love the nonsensical things that go with it and the inaction that accompanies it. i wasn't wrong to be sceptical about 1 Malaysia. Lets see what the authorities do about carrying a cows head to a Hindu temple construction site. ISH! I could rant on and on but i don't wanna end up counting bars do i? How to BLog then? :p

Moving on to happy thoughts, i just read one of my seniors blog. she's is so in love that i wanna be in love too :D
Hahaha.....seriously reading her blog, makes me smile from ear to ear, she's writing her very own fairy tale and its so hopelessly romantic!
awwww...wish her all happiness and many more sweet times.

I was talking to a distant cousin about job prospects in Singapore and he was telling me about the perks and all. and of all the things he told me, u know wt I'm excited about? They are in trend with the US, so what ever comes out there, comes out in Singapore too! Awesome kan!!

Happy Monday everyone =)

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Koyla & Pu

i went to watch a Tamil movie with Kohilah today.

We had Nandos =))))
I love Peri-Peri chicken..its so yummy! tho our waiter was the same guy who served us the last time. errrr....he's polite and all but he just sounds very fake and i x feel good bout him, and Kohi agrees too! Why I'm blogging about the waiter i don't even like?? just to fill up the space :S

So anyway this movie is called Kanthasamy (i laughed like mad first time i heard it, haha!) it was super-duper-crazy-giler-babi long! but i liked the camera-work, everything was projected beautifully wit lots of vibrant colors and taste (if i might add). and for once the actress had something to do; by that i mean a more substantial screen time rather than just appearing for songs without actually delivering lines.
overall i guess it was ok, your average Tamil movie with awesome art direction.

I wanna go watch movie tomorrow also!

oh, btw we don't have to go to India to experience chaos in the cinemas. feel free to walk into the nearest Tamil-movie-playing cinema in Malaysia to experience whistles, cat-calls, jeering, clapping and ooh-aahing. i guess we only fall short to Indian (read: in India)cinemas in that nobody dances and fights.......yet!

Monday, August 24, 2009

quick updates

I purposely sleep freaking late every night just so that i can sleep in in the morning but guess what?

i wake up at FREAKING! 6.30-7.30am. What am i gonna do being up so early? and then i try hard to sleep back downstairs with channel E! on in the background; which is not a good idea cause i wake up unsure if Reggie bush and Kim Kardashian got back together or it was just my dream. Weird subconscious stuff :S

Then i feel disgusted cause all i do is be a couch potato while the bright side of the globe is up on its feet and working their asses off. but well not for long :)
better enjoy it while i can :))

and i write stupid blogs bout random stuff.

OH! i got myself a shoe which is a cross between a gladiator shoe + fringe shoe.
and i've been wearing it all weekend...even to pasar malam! :)

pics coming up

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Roller-CARster

What is it with me and time? I'm rarely late, but on the days when i'm desperately trying to be somewhere on time, that's when i get time-scares!

Yesterday was my first ever interview (yes! i've never worked-for-pay before) so i leave my house at 9-9.15 am to go to teh office in Brickfields. And there is still bloody jam on the road on Jln Kuching and after Jln Duta leading to KL Sentral. GOD! I was praying so hard to be on time, like i've never prayed before. I was having visions of what i would be telling my great-grandchildren (I plan on being around for a long time ((= ); I was late for my first interview; does that paint a picture of a very responsible person?? NO i didn't think so too.

Ok well, it was 9.45 already and the interview is at 10, I still haven't passed KL sentral!!

STRESS!!!!!

Then (sheerly by some miracle) the line started to move and after several hard pumps on the accelerator and a fast bend later i was at the traffic light turning into Brickfields. Red Light. Damn! Time: 9.55

I see a homeless-possibly- mentally-challenged person my side of the road and his crossing the road; whereby he'll be right beside my door. So I, in what i thought was a discreet move had to lock my door, and the guy saw! He started towards me with a threatening finger. I must have looked cool and composed but my Heart rate was so high it would have shot of my head. Green Light. Thank Heavens!

Made two rounds before parking, walked around the car park when there was a short cut and ran into the building. Thank god i had Lift-time to compose myself. Pheww. Time: 10.01, I make my presence known.

Moral of the story:

1) Always lock your car after getting in Not only when you see potentially-dangerous people.

2) KL traffic is a bitch!

3) I always go through emotional roller-coasters before reaching my destination, but I always (till now) arrive on time ;)

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

The Thailand issue

At the risk of sounding overly-feminist, i declare that women are the biggest enemy for a woman striving to live in a modern society. Yes. Men, don't know how it feels like to be looked down upon as the weaker sex; I can understand why- they aren't exactly the most sensitive people around & simply because they lack the extra X gene and the package that comes with it. Women on the other hand are supposed to be more understanding right? Hell NO!

A simple scenario: Girl wants to go Thailand with a group of friends (she's legal,responsible and reasonably smart). Mom bursts out. Her reasoning?

1> "It's not a nice place"

~ Define nice? I don't think so. And this coming from a person who has been there a few times for company trips.

2> "It's dangerous for young girls"

~ So I'm assuming that the big danger here is the girl might get abducted by some lusty hormone driven guy and be subjected to rape and torture. Therefore following that line of thinking,....it is okay for older women to go there? It is okay if they are subjected to such brutality cause they are old?

Sorry for the language but a rapist couldn't give a f*** about whether you're young or old, wrinkly or firm. He just needs a god damn hole!

In Malaysia, 9 out of 10 rapes go unreported. This means that out of the 1,431 reported cases last year, there were actually more than 14,000 rape incidents that happened in our country in 2002 alone. The number of reported rape cases has been steadily increasing with a slight dip in year 2000. Statistics last year shows that only about 20% of rape incidents happened in public places, while nearly 70% of them happened in the "safety" of homes. Nearly 80% of rapists are people known by the survivor (WAO, 2003)

Based on stats, wow, I think it isn't safe to stay at home now. Lets pack and leave!

3> "You can go there for your honey-moon"

~ The confidence you have in ONE guy can't be matched by a WHOLE GROUP of girls?????

4> "You don't know the world."

~ You don't get to know the world by sitting down in the safe confinements of your home and reading the newspaper. I've known many people who have gone around the world and came back with many good memories. If you haven't done it, I don't think it's your place to comment.

5> "When you become a mother you'll understand. This is what I told my mom, and see how i am now with you all"

~ Question: HOW DO YOU KNOW? Even I don't know what I'm gonna be in the next few days. Using Bandura's Social Learning Theory,a possible explanation is this. Our parents turn out like their parents because that's the only model of parenting they have experienced. Therefore when clueless has to how to act, they revert to how they think their parents would have acted. This is perfectly normal and acceptable in most cases. BUT they are always exceptions.

If you don't wanna be a certain way nobody can make you. Hence if I disagree with all the above reasoning, they is no way in my sane-n -healthy mind will i impose such restrictions on my children just to deal with MY own fears.

Women let their lives and their female children's lives to be controlled and dictated by the crimes and criminals. Don't go out at night, there'll be someone waiting to pounce etc. They know they were subjected to double standards and and i think they start believing that they ARE really inferior and can't do anything (traveling in this context) on their on in a BIG BAD WORLD. Worst part is, they pass this down to their female children and the cycle goes on.

To me it all comes down to perspetive. I see my world in rainbow-schemes with black dots here and there. You see it black speckled with tiny dots of white.

Sunday, July 26, 2009

A Phenomenal Women

She pulled at our heartstrings every other festive season
She gave us movies that touched the fundamentals of human relationships,
She gave us expressions of art that were very Malaysian in every way.
From Rabun in 2003 to Talent-time in 2009 she made me marvel at her capabilities as
a movie-maker. Something I don't do often.

I remember watching a movie once where she cameos to give the aspiring director in the movie a piece of advice. the gist of it was:

"Make movies about emotions. It is the hardest to potray but also the easiest to understand. People understand emotions."

And i can't agree more. Her movies and advertisements stood testimony to her believe.

I admit I don't know much about the real Yasmin Ahmad. But the glimpse of Yasmin Ahmad through her blog shows a woman who embraced the soft side women are born with (and looked down upon for) and turned it into a force so strong, through film-making that while highlighting the differences between the races in Malaysia, brought people closer.

For simply being bold and courageous, For making movies that were fresh and real and smart and yes! sentimental,



Yasmin you will be missed.

The Next Chapter

The sharp needles of rain,
strike at me with fury,
i see the droplets of water
dripping of the bridge of my nose and
i wonder if there's more to this
uncalled for lashing,
soaking anxiety,
the undying feeling of wanting more,
the sinking realization that maybe
just maybe my time is running out
before the world rushes past me
me, myself and i
invisible, and cold in a big dark hole
a spiraling, whirling hole called
L.I.F.E

Saturday, July 25, 2009

thru my lense

Since my last post was very heavy, i m now gonna revert to some light-hearted observations I so easily can make day in and out.

1) Malaysians love their pasar malam. We really do! What else are we gonna do rather than carry our thick purse out once or twice a week to hoard on food that can feed an entire 'kampung' or two. And besides, it's not like we can go anywhere else because the dedicated pasar malam vendors would take the liberty of setting up their stalls WAY to early in the afternoon in the blazing madness called sunlight and block the on-going traffic!

2)There are 3 lanes on the road. 1st track slow, 2nd track slightly faster, 3rd track: you catch a glimpse of the car and the 'whoosh' of speed. Everyone is happy in their tracks and going at a pre-determined pace. Then you- Ms. middle lane, wants to overtake the car in front of you. To do that you put your signal to the left and attempt to move in the 1st track. and SUDDENLY mr. 1st lane remembers an emergency, triggered by your signal and blocks your every attempt to enter the first lane by deliberately going faster!

3) Notice how most advertisements, pictures etc showcasing the multi-racial composition of Malaysia specifically looks for a really dark boy or girl with a 'bindi' stuck on the forehead to represent an Indian. Since some people are ignorant enough, let me enlighten you, Indians are NOT all dark, oily haired, "bindi' wearers who speak with a bob in their heads. And when we do shake their heads it's because it is called Bharata-Natyam; a classical indian dance. We DO NOT walk around shaking our heads like we have a joint out of place in our neck. Chinese are NOT all flat eyed, with a killing obsession for money and Malays are NOT all lazy and self-indulgent. The only way to OneMalaysia is to STOP racial stereotypes.

4) When you are about to make a turn at a junction, waiting for the on-going cars to cease temporarily so that you can take that turn and go back home to use the toilet...URGENTLY! that is when some stupid, air-headed people (and I'm sorry to say girls/women of all ages, mostly) would walk slowly, and gracefully, shaking their hips from side to side, sharing some latest gossip about whose husband ran away with whom without a car for the bloody traffic, the cars or somebody's almost bursting bladder! And it gets worst, they have the nerve..the BLOODY nerve to stare at you if you horn at them after which they continue their pace of walking!

5) If you're feeling like getting an instant recognition date Giggs or any of the MU player. You'll be granted a title in no time. Malaysians have taken to a very generous behavior in granting titles to people these days. Dance around the tree in Bollywood, play football and strike goals like you are supposed to against MU or just jump down KLCC, you'll get your 'Grandpa'-title in no time =)

p/s: non-Malaysians are invited too. What can i say? Malaysia Boleh!

Religion X or Y- Does it matter?

As a child, religion, beliefs, the concept of dualities; life and death, heaven and hell, made little to no sense to me. To a certain extent these concepts are still lost to me though at least now i make feeble attempts at trying to understand them.
So sitting at my computer desk on a Saturday afternoon, i question and more importantly answer the question that has always been playing in my mind. Why am i a Hindu? am i a Hindu just because I'm born into a Hindu family? Why is anyone the religion they are?

My thesis on religiosity and pro-social behavior exposed to me to a whole breed of youngsters who do not claim to profess any religion. Though taken aback at first, I guess it's quite a honest thing to do rather than hide under the facade of a religion while doing exactly the opposite of what the religion preaches; or disagreeing explicitly but going along with what parents and the larger society forces upon us.

So coming back to me, why am i a Hindu? Recently i came across an e-mail between a Hindu guy and his friend, which pretty much summed up my thoughts for me. The bold and italics are his words and the remaining- mine.

I'm a Hindu because:

'You can believe in one god and he can be a
Hindu. You may believe in multiple deities and still you can be a
Hindu. What's more - you may not believe in god at all, still you can
be a Hindu. An atheist can also be a Hindu.'


Am i religious?

I enjoy going to temples, i enjoy doing rituals but i can't say that I devote all my time in temple and service to God but i do feel a relationship with a higher being.

'God is a friend. No- I am not afraid of God. Nobody has made any
compulsions on me to perform these rituals regularly.'


So in my definition of religiousness (though people might beg to differ), yes i guess i am religious.

Have i thought of conversion?

Honestly, I have but that was because I wanted to go to Sunday with my close friends who were mostly Christians. Now that I'm older and hopefully wiser,

'Why should I? Even if I challenge some of the rituals and faith in
Hinduism, nobody can convert me from Hinduism. Because, I like being able to
think independently and objectively, without
conditioning. I remain as a Hindu never by force, but choice.'

'Hinduism is not a religion, but a set of beliefs and
practices. It is not a religion like Christianity or Islam because it
is not founded by any one person or does not have an organized
controlling body like the Church or the Order, I added. There is no
institution or authority'


I do not discard the divine reality. Our
scripture, or Sruthis or Smrithis - Vedas and Upanishads or the Gita -
say God might be there or he might not be there. But we pray to that
supreme abstract authority (Para Brahma) that is the creator of this
universe. We have a concept - abstract - not a personal god.'

'The entry level Hinduism has over-whelming superstitions too. The philosophical side of Hinduism negates all superstitions.'

'Nobody can convert you to Hinduism, because it is not a religion, but a set of beliefs and practices.'

'Hinduism is referred to as Sanathana Dharma, the eternal faith. It is based on the practice of Dharma, the code of life. The most important aspect of Hinduism is being truthful to oneself. Hinduism has no monopoly on ideas.- It is open to all. Hindus believe in one God (not a personal one) expressed in different forms. For them, God is timeless and formless entity.'

'I don't think that God is as silly as an autocratic emperor who wants others
to respect him or fear him.'


To me, not having an organized controlling body allows me to be in control of my own direction in the spiritual world. I've been to the Hindu equivalent of Sunday classes, while i respect them for their devotion in teaching the "right" way of practicing/ interpreting Hinduism, the cynical side of me refuses to completely believe in the "transcendental wisdom" of the preacher. With all due respect, human beings will be just that- human beings. And the one-to-fit-all mental framework where we have to put aside our inherent differences to reach God does not appeal to me now and i doubt it will in the future.

My Personal Favorite:

'if you look for meaning in life, don't look for it in religions; don't go from one cult to another or from one guru to the next. For a real seeker, I told her, the Bible itself gives guidelines when it says ' Kingdom of God is within you.' I reminded her of Christ's teaching about the love that we have for each other. That is where you can find the meaning of life.

Loving each and every creation of the God is absolute and real.

'Isavasyam idam sar vam' Isam (the God) is present (inhabits) here
everywhere - nothing exists separate from the God, because God is
present everywhere. Respect every living being and non-living things
as God.


I found this particularly funny :p:

'Ancestors of today's Hindus believe in eternal truths and cosmic laws and these truths are opened to anyone who seeks them.'But there is a section of Hindus who are either superstitious or turned fanatic to make this an organized religion like others. The British coin the word 'Hindu' and considered it as a religion.'Religions have become an MLM (multi-level- marketing)industry that has been trying to expand the market share by conversion. The biggest business in today's world is Spirituality.

Hinduism is no exception'


Above all, the reason I'm at ease with the religion I was born with and have grown to know and love is

'The fact is Hinduism is a religion of the individual, for the
individual and by the individual with its roots in the Vedas and the
Bhagavad-Gita. It is all about an individual approaching a personal
God in an individual way according to his temperament and inner
evolution - it is as simple as that.'