pre-dating haloween!

in the days that pre-dates halloween,
four friends skip class to go to bangsar. they are
A, D, M & of course Pu. first they drop by HSBC to have
"authentic BAngsar cuisine"
then, they park in Bangsar Village coz there is a freakin yellow line everywer else!
and they walk to Czip Lee, then PArty shop.
its all HAloween in here, masks, spears, outfits, streamers, gooey-ooey stuff.!
A, D, M and Pu have fun trying on different masks and cam-whoring! Pu tries on this big Afro hair and is still lauffin at the thought! =D
then the awesome -foursome go to the Pet-Shop
Here, M and Pu stare at the chart with pictures of dogs and decide which they like best. Pu goes for Golden Retrievers, while M likes German Shepards. but they both
agree that bulldogs( and variations that look like it) aint nice.
A and D are looking at cats and A almost squeezes Pu's hands off at the sight
of persian kittens.
****************************************************************************
*phone rings*
Pu: Hey
V: meet for drink?
Pu: Okie!
V: Msg me when u leave coll.

Text: V says: I bet you can't make it back to Gombak from HELP by 5pm.
Place: Gombak
Time: 4.34 pm.

Text: Pu says: Yes, I can!
Place: HELP University College. Pusat Bandar Damansara.
Time: 4.34 pm

Pu takes a diversion to send M back.
back on track at 4.36pm

Text: Pu says: I'm here, where are u?
Place: Gombak
Time: 5pm.

Moral of the story: When a girl says she can, u better as hell believe her!

Pu: *ROFL* at V!!!

*drama-licious*

some should really grow up,
some others should really know how to be considerate,
then there are the ones who lack self respect,
and even brains.
whine, whine and whine
all day and all night.
complain, complain, complain,
dawn to dusk,
never learning to give but always expecting to take.

blessed is thee, that is slightly self aware
cursed is thee, that has to make others aware.

annoying annito!

anythin u can do, i can do betta...
i can do anythin better than you...
No u cant.
yes i CAN!
No u cant.
yes i CAN!
No u cant.
yes i CANNNN!!!!
do do do dope dee do do


muahahahhahahahhaah ann nicole nunis i can so see ur expresssion right now!

halow-ween @ HELP

two weeks to the big day! hopefully it hits the target both of ppl and also $$.
ethin lookin good so far, just keeping my fingers crossed. let there not be a catastrophic event on that day *says a prayer*
food? (check!)
mucic? (check!)
band/s? (check!)
dance? (check!)
lay-out? (check!)
haunted hse? (hhmmm)
my outfit? (hhmmm)
tix? (hhmm)
deadline? (approaching fast)
my sanity in the midst of all this? wow!! (CHECK!!)

** thanks to all the people in the night of mayhem team who are still workin their hot assess off this project! =D

i dont need all the bling
neither do i need the cash, the glam
or a loose fling.

all i need is right here
a pair of eyes that looks into me
makes my heart race, skip and do the salsa
i need strong arms that holds me thru the nite
keepin me warm and safe
i need words that soothe, that comfort
not flattering sweet NOTHINGS but
that which is spoken from the heart.

i wan the one who takes chances
high on life, turned on by the hopes of tom
the brainy, hopeless, romantic.

You Are 91% Feminist

You are a total feminist. This doesn't mean you're a man hater (in fact, you may be a man). You just think that men and women should be treated equally. It's a simple idea but somehow complicated for the world to put into action.

Are You a Feminist?

Your EQ is 133

You are remarkable when it comes to relating with others. Only the biggest losers get under your skin. You are warm and open. Even when life gets you down, you're unafraid of the world and its challenges. You are comfortable with who you are. And you accept your weaknesses - as well as the weaknesses of others. While you are quite stable, you don't respond perfectly to every bad situation that comes up. But you have enough emotional intelligence to know when you need a course correction.

What's Your EQ (Emotional Intelligence Quotient)?

Your Style is Sassy

Your date outfits are flirty and fun - and make guys smile Occasionally you'll take a fashion risk, and it will pay off You're up for flashing an inch or two of skin But your general rule is to leave most of your bod to the imagination

Is Your Date Fashion Style Classy, Sassy, or Trashy?

Your Independence Level: High

You are extremely self reliant and autonomous. You are definitely into doing your own thing. But you also wouldn't turn down help if you needed it. You follow your own path, but you don't do so blindly.

How Independent Are You?

Your Love Style is Agape

You are a caring, kind, and selfless partner. Unsurprisingly, your love style is the most rare. You are willing to sacrifice your world for your sweetie. Except it doesn't really feel like sacrifice to you. For you, nothing feels better than giving to the one you love.

What's Your Love Style?

on a boring sunday morning....=)

an age old war of faiths

today i found out sumn new, Oprah has a religion. a new age movement thingy. i'm not quite sure wat its about, but from wat i understood from the few you tube videos i saw is that she does not say that christianity is wrong or anythin, she's just thinkin out of the box and saying that your god and my god can be our god.

and a video that was i assume a few years back had her saying that, one person's god may be different from the other's but if it leads them down the same road to 'the lite' (though through different paths) wats wrong with that.it gives each of them the same type of satisfaction. and for once i din see facinated audience nodding in agreement, i saw a rebuttal (and a very strong one!)these ladies in the audience seat were saying that how can she say such a thing coz ther's only one god and there's only one way to him through Jesus. and it wasnt a discussion but a final say on the part of the audience.

now, i respect Jesus and Christianity and all the other religions and cults or wateva that ppl believe in as long as they find their meaning in it and dont hurt anyone while at it. i was taken aback by not what oprah said, but by the audience. isnt that the reason for fights in the world? the iraq war, temple demolitions in malaysia and what not. when ppl start thinkin their religion is the ONE and ONLY way, its fine as long as they keep it within, but when they explicitly state it out, it seems to belittle the other religions in the world and also their believers. and thats just not right. everybody believes in whatever they do because they see meaning in it. it has a personal significance to them. what you and me find in our religion, if another gets by being in a cult, then let them be. you can express your opinion but in a respectful way and so that u dont hurt the other person. and if they still are strong in their believes, who are we to say that they are wrong? if they are, let god be the judge of that. if they arent, good for them.

all we are supposed to do is look at a person for who there are, human beings are different. we look different, we have different colors, we speak different languages and yea, we have different ways of worshipping GOD. but all i know is that we have our humanity in common and we should build on that by respecting each others differences- including their different believe systems.

i may not be a really prim and proper Hindu, but i have faith in god, i have felt miracles and i have had my prayers answered, i have cried out of devotion (it happens some times k), if suddenly someone comes up to me and forcefully tell me that my believe is wrong, their god is the one and only, and im wasting my time. how do you think that will make me feel? or anyone in my position from any form of faith?
it would be very hurtful though my faith would be intact. and thats not a nice thing to do to someone. how would you feel if someone said the same to u about your faith?

it just takes moments for the reverse to happen. and then all that will happen is both ppl of different religion fighting without a reason and believe me it will never end. and more wars in the name of religion, ppl fighting left and right and dying and destroying everythin god created in the process-that's wt will happen.

is it all worth it just ti prove who's god is betta or bigger or the ONE?

to me its not.

e-shopping mania

itz crazy i tell u!
the wonders of technology
u'r grounded? cant go shoppin? cant get the car?
not to worry!
clothes and the 4 letter word every girl loves S-A-L-E
comes right to your home!
i get up every day thinking wat i can pamper myself with today.
sheesh!! a blessing? more like a curse

but a curse i would like to live a lifetime with =)

land below the wind-Day 1

im in sabah!!
the much awaited trip that we (frez and i) have been plannin on for months.
took the 4.30 air asia bus from sentral. with only minimal sleep but a full stomach (i had tandoori and naan= sgt the awesome)managed to get to lcct. after checking in and all, we went to cofee bean foe some perks. mine was just mineral water la. ann and dev had breakfast with scramble eggs and all. iz and his apple pie. after that coolly we wnt thru the gate and scanned our hand luggage. guess wat! we hear our names in the speaker asking us to board the plane asap. wth?!
cepat2 jln into the plane, its so freaking full that i gt a aisle! seat right at the back. actually all of us gt aisle seats except for dev who was squeezed between 2 big guys. haha!

so i din get the window seat, big deal!

of course its a big deal coz the ppl hu were seating near the window actually closed it and were sleeping. better let me sit there kan. sheeewsh! then a grandpa sneezed right in my ear that i almost jumped outta my seat. so not funny i tell u! i was trying to sleeep!. and it happened twice- with the same effect on me.
landed in sabah at 9.30, ann was throwing up (just air sickness) and we were waiting for mich's dad. after that gt some food n back to mich's apartment. and after a hot shower i crashed on the sofa for i x know how long but it was so nice to finally sleep with out the fear of missing a flight.
in the evening we went to Tanjung aru (driven there by our very own ann since she's the only one that can handle a stick.)beach oh beach! dont u just love beaches, the breeze, the trees, the smell of salt water, the crab holes in the sand, and u walking barefooted as the waves hit ur feet.seriously the view was really beautiful and the granpa sneezing and aisle seat was all worthwhile. =)) we had coconut water by the beach. and it din wanna finish. it was almost like a bottomless coconut but nevertheless yummy and refreshing. it was dark and drizzling by the time we made our way back to the car. and we came home to a home-cooked meal by mich's mom which was also good.
now at 12am. im bloggin bout the whole thing while the rest are watching ocean's 12. i'm done 4 the day. nitez ppl!

~essence of me~

i have been inspired by a fellow blogger and a IM friend to be more thoughts driven. and one thing that i firmly, solely believe in and that drives me from within is, women rights.

probably due to my family history, or mebbe the first hand experience i get from watchin the women in my life, or even from my instinctive connectedness with the plight of other women who are strangers to me but nevertheless important, i've developed a passion for these issues.

looking at this from a cultural perspective, being an Indian, i know and have read about how disadvantaged women have been in the past and even to a certain extent the present. what the future holds is no longer in the hands of fate but, in our own.even in the times of the RAmayan (a hindu epic) Sita had to burn herself in order to PROVE her chastity to the world, husband included. for those of you who don't know this story, the fire did not consume her, and the world acknowledged her chastity, however, she did not return to her husband, merely because she claimed that though the whole world turned its back on her, he should have known better.

contrary to my cinderella and snow white, as a child, this story frustrtaed me. but now, i look at it in a whole new way. even in those ancient times women were strong enough to endure obstacles to prove their worth. even in those times, women had the dignity and self respect to walk away from their husbands (it was a huge deal then) to stand their ground. even then, there were strong women around and i dont see any reason why, women of the modern age can't draw strength from their selfs.

i see girls who let their lives be dictated by their good-for-nuthing bfs, or aunties who have to do everything for their husbands (inclusive of removing their shoes and socks), ladies who agree to marriage to the wrong guy, just so they don't die alone, girls who allow themselves to be beaten up and abused and girls who simply just stand by and watch as life throws crap at them. i feel for them, i sympathize, i emphatize.

but then again, im sorry for them cause they expect respect from others when they dont respect themselves, they expect love from others when they dont love themselves, they expect others to defend them when they dont defend themselves, they expect others to make their decisions for themselves when the answers are obvious and finally, they expect others to be their voice, when they refuse to speak for themselves.

here's to the strong women in my life, who have and i believe will alwiz stay strong and stay true to themselves and most importantly, acknowledge the inner strength and self respect mother nature has blessed us with and which women across time have fought so hard to prove.

My grandma: for fighting through the near-poverty state and educating all your children. for keeping the family together and always being there.

My mom: for taking the "D" step that changed our lives forever and for the better.most importantly, for finding love again and being brave enough to go against the odds.

My Auntie: for being strong and independent, and brave. for enjoying life's simplest things.

My Mich: for deciding you had enough of a dormant relationship and being proactive and taking a stand, though it hurt.

My Ann: for following your heart and standing up for your rights to happiness.for tolerating more than your share and being the one to make the decision.

My Arathy: for mending the bits and pieces and moving on to achive bigger dreams.

My Kohilah: for not taking shit from people who take advantage of you, for being assertive , for knowing yourself and for now finding that someone special.

My Suha: for always being level headed and charging at live head first. for the confidence you carry within and the faith you have in ur loved ones.

My Shalina: for thriving in spite of the circumstances, for not letting ur past hold you back from the promise of a better future.

My one and all: for being the woman you are.

** i guess no matter how much i try, i'm still driven by emotions, they are afterall the easiest to convey **

<3

**fancy things, will
never come in between
You're part of my entity,
here for infinity
When the world has took it's part
When the world has dealt it's cards
your hand in mine, together
we'll mend your heart.**

**When the sun shine,
we shine together
Told you I'll be here forever
Said I'll always be your friend
Took an oath I'ma stick it out till the end
Now that it's raining more than ever
Know that we'll still have each other**

**for the friends who turned into family**

lazy me

its 4.10pm on a lazy sunday evening.
havent done one bit of my assignment for ethics class (except find a case).
and all i can think about is :"what shall i munch on while watching tv"
procastination at its worst!
ok mebbe not worst la.
i swear there are ppl worst than me.
**that thought makes me feel betta**
SMILES

uncle dearest

i had to blog about this cause i just found it sooooo funny.
my uncle, smart as he is, on the tech side he is....well, like most adults are i assume- not so good! haha

so uncle dearest bought a labtop. and put all his fav old-blaque-white songs in it. then one day some good for nuthin ppl go send him virus. what does uncle dearest do? he curses those ppl and gets his comp fixed. after that he is very careful with his labtop and never trust anyone near it. even us (those who can handle a comp well). trust no one with his DELL.

so one day i happily log into msn and find a certain rosliehussin@hotmail.com (this is the nick) in my contacts list. and i'm like who the hell? then i put the cursor on it and it reveals the real email add, *gasp* uncle dearest!

on my trip to uncle dearest's hse i asked him

(in the car)

Me: uncle dearest, why is your email nick rosliehussin@hotmail.com?
Uncle dearest: (confidently) you know, my lil naive niece, ppl send you virus thru msn. so to trick all those virus senders, i have decided to put rosliehussin@hotmail.com. let those buggers send me virus now. its gonna go there. smart eh?
Me: ROFL!
Ppl in the backseat of the car: ROFL!!

ok it might not be funny 4 those reading, but believe me, i had a good time lauffin. and uncle dearest was just blushin away when we told him that his lil-plan aint gonna work. and obviously why so.

weekend-er

so its the end of a long weekend (oh no!). its back to coll tom. my first class of the day is at 3pm. wth??!! sheesh!
>>to recap wat i did over the weekend.<<

1) Bowling nite-16/05
dined in at d'lish mid valley before hittin the bowling alley. i went in late, kinda loose track of time when u have loads to eat and fwenz to gossip with u know. so it aint my fault :p played for an hour and was craving 4 more but since i followed my cousins, so must follow their schedule laa. anyway i'm glad i went coz even tho i'm not a shalin-zulkifli-comparable player (actually its not only bowling, i suck at all types of sport) i improved compared to the last time i went. so 3 cheers for me!!

2) Freshmen Luncheon-17/05
i have a whole post dedicated to this, so i'll elaborate no further.

3) me Uncle'z-18/05
at 12 we left 4 shah alam, my uncle and aunty's wedding anniversary, their 11th. thats a pretty long time to stay married to the same person u know. hehehehe..just kidding! we got a cake 4 my uncle..wait! i followed him but he gt the cake himself and wrote the msg himself. kasihan i know! but in my defense, im a student with no money coz my mom hasn't given me my allowance yet and i x carry my bank card everywer. :) as it always is in my family, there was loads of food to stuff our selfs with and lotsa chattering at the same time. that is wt happens wen e1 wants to talk at the same time=chaotic i tell u! but i still love my big fat INDIAN family! :P at nite i was in front of the tv with 2 of my couz and my sis all set to watch the Zee Cine Awards 08 (for those of you who dont know, Zee is a hindi broadcast network and the awards are for bollywood celebs). of course my 10 year ol couz was not happy with it. but hey, y would i miss watching shah rukh dance and strut his stuff to play monopoly with my couz?i x even like monopoly. i slept off while watchin tho :( and misssed the finale. haiz!

4) i'm back home-19/05
i think i'm gonna sleep la now. n probably go out later. oh i should mention that i kept up with my workload and so far have done evrything required of me =) *pats self on the back*

snoozeeee!

p/s: i still think taare zameen par was better than chakde india. sorry shah rukh!

~freshmen luncheon~

date: 17th May 2008
time: 12-4pm
venue: KPD E,Level 4, Exhibition area.

And the event? The must have of every new semester, the Freshmen Luncheon. Loads of robe clad bodies,formal dress-codes, rows of tables decorated with flower petals, soft music, the tantalizing aroma of buffet lunch, pretty decorations and the icing on the cake? inspiring speeches from our fellow peers and lecturers. Apart from all these, the luncheon is symbolic in the lives of HELP University College freshmen as it marks the beginning of a new journey- the journey as the seeker of knowledge,the journey as a scholar, the journey of a psychology undergraduate.
This event is exclusively, as the name suggest, for freshmen of the May 2008 semester and was attended by the newbies along with their parents. The event was also graced by the lecturers of the Department of Psychology, among others Dr. Goh Chee Leong, Dr. Anasuya Jegathesan, Dr. Ng Wai Sheng, Mr. Franklin Morais, Dr. Graham Fulton, Ms. Yeo Pei Li, Pn. Fathimah, Ms. Vanitha Chandrasegaram and Ms. Serena Sinniah. Graduate tutors and staff of B.Psych, Ms. Farah Gulamoydeen, Ms. Joy Ooi, Ms. Josephine Gan, Ms. Sheryl Chong, Pn. Haslinda Islakhuddin and Ms. Serena In were also present at the event. Together with them, the B.Psych Student Council 08/09, tutors and volunteers were all there to help out where needed and join in the occasion.
Shortly after 11am, the guests started arriving at Block E and their first stop? Level 2 the robing area. Freshmen, faculty members and senior students were all given graduation robes (minus the hat) before they headed to Level 4 where the event was being held. Just for today, the guest who parked in KPD E were given a flat rate of RM3 for parking as long as their parking tickets were stamped. The tickets stamping booth was also in Level 2.
At level 4, the atmosphere and the arrangement of the seating was almost similar to the Opening Feast in Hogwarts, what with four long rows of tables and eager students and lecturers and all. The only difference was that we did not have floating candles, our food did not miraculously appear and our Dumbledore (Dr.Goh Chee Leong) does not have an overflowing beard and moustache :p what they (Dumbledore and Dr.Goh) do have in common, however is that Dr. Goh's presence as the emcee in the front of all the guest just demanded everyone's attention and who better to start off the event then the Head of Department himself. He's speech on his hopes of B.Psych students being scholars in their own right was a demonstration of the high standards he has set for us and one that all of us-juniors and seniors alike will strive to fulfill. Then, the president of B.Psych Student Council 08/09 Mr. Choo Kok Wui welcomed the freshmen to the psychology fraternity and gave a brief overview of the opportunities in HELP as well as an introduction to Careersense-which would have put all the parents' worries about job prospects for their children at ease. Next we had a senior student, Mr.John Kiat speak about his journey as a psychology undergraduate and what it takes to be an ace student- not books, not pens, not papers- but a dream and a will to achieve it. Finally, Dr.Ng Wai Sheng shared with us her own experience as a student and how she followed her heart and overcame all obstacles to pursue the study of psychology. She also gave an inspiring example of how obstacles can sometimes be blessings in disguise. After a series of speeches, the feast began!
The food was arranged by Banana Cafe and most people thought that it was pretty good with a lot of varieties and options. After eating, the guest headed back to Level 2 to hand back the robes and were able to leave. The disrobing marked the end of the event. A special thanks to Ms. Sheryl Chong and Ms. Serena In for organizing the event and for everyone who graced it with their presence. and to the newbies, Welcome to the B.Psych and All the Best! :)

improving life at HELP

HELP University College. a name synonym, if not to everybody, to me at least with self discovery, friends and the religion that unites us all- PSYCHOLOGY! its funny how that as psychology students, we are thought that a well balanced and stress-free life is of utmost importance to an individual. in abnormal psych among other areas in psych, its drilled into our minds that stress could be an important cause of mental disorders. however when the second half of the semester dawns on us, when the due dates are approaching, when the workload seems unbearable -among other problems- we loose our cool, we succumb to the stress which not only jeopardize our work quality but also has the potential to cause us to lash out at loved ones. all these due to the self consuming devil = S.T.R.E.S.S
what do we do about it, you ask?? well that's for you to decide. what can you do about it? you don't need psychology knowledge to know what to do, you just have to know your self well- what works, what doesn't.the most important thing that will need to change in order to have an improved life as an undergrad is the "tidak apa" (couldn't-care-less) mind set so pervasive among students. we go on and on about how stressed we are, how terrible the lecturers are for giving us loads to do, how inefficient the tutors are, but deep down u and i know that we are the cause of our on problems.our lack of planning and effort causes us trouble at the end of the day. then again this might not be true of everyone, but if I'm not wrong this is how most of us- students are.
having said that, there might be many ways to improve student life in HELP, through activities, clubs and what not, but no matter to what lenghts the student council, the club committees, the lecturers and anyone else tries to improve student life, it all boils down to the student at the end of the day if he/she is willing to take the responsibility for him/herself and improve his/her own life as a student in general and a psychology undergraduate specifically. if we open our eyes and ears wide enough, at present there are so many things that can improve student life all around us- sports,internship opportunities,events etc . I'm not saying that it cant get better, but it will need you, you, YOU and ME to bring about that change for the benefit of everyone.its time we stopped sitting around waiting, and entrusting someone else to improve our lives for us. u want a de-stress party? then plan one!see a prob in the way things are run? make your self heard! don't know how? ASK! could'nt care less? well, thats your choice. :)

**moushumi**

just the other day i was watchin this mira nair movie called 'the namesake'. the movie was quite nice plus kal penn was nice to watch. but the thing that attracted me more to the movie is the character of Moushumi. she's a bengal girl who grows up in the US and belongs to a typical male-dominant bengali family(most indian families are). so here goes, she marries Gogol/Nikhil another bengali guy raised in US.

but the thing is, she is an americanized brown women. and she has an affair coz she is afraid that she might end up trapped like her mother and not be able to be anything more than a typical bengali housewife (though she was working and is really an independent women).her husband is also not the typical indian guy. she gets this major job offer in france and she has to turn it down because she's married.and she cant just go flyin away to france leaving her husband and home and all (but she acts as if its her husbands fault).

>>to me i really feel that most ppl hu come from complete families (dad, mom, children), they kinda underestimate the institution of family and marriage. its almost like since they(girls) saw their moms being submissive to their dads dread the idea of giving in even when they have to/must coz they dont want to end up being the subordinate of their husbands. sometimes it can work in a good way too if they come from a complete family wer the parents are loving and equal.

>> i havent been married but i do know the effects of being a child from a broken marriage. u do get on fine (if ur lucky) but there's always this part in you that wonders why couldnt you have a complete family with both parents to love n hate, to lauff and cry . and also how different your life would be if things were different. you dont know how it feels to envy ppl because of the parent that they have and u dont.

>> so, dont marry if you have unresolved issues. and when you do marry and start a family, be responsible enough to do your part for your family and work hard to make it last( and yes sacrifices have to be made sometimes).that doesnt mean you're weak. i'm not sayin that you have to put up wit an abusive partner. but be mindful that not everyone is perfect and divorce is not a sign of strenght wen it is used just to show that you can. for the girls/women divorce is act a sign that u have failed in keeping up a family.and have the decency not to cheat on your husband!

rainbowz

She looked out of the window,
on a dewy Saturday morning,
the dark clouds threatened to fall,
to shower the earth with tiny droplets.
Her skin tingled at the touch of the soft breeze,
a breeze so fresh that it whispered to her,
whispered the forgotten wonders of nature.
greens woke in the company of dews,
and browns stood as solid as ever
proud and tall;
in dark brown soil.
Like a message from up above,
the cottons of the sky parted
and down it shone from the heavens
the golden ray of light.
Together came little crystals of water
It was then she saw it,
Took it all in,
And at once she knew;
a moment to savour.
Closed her eyes,
Remembered every detail forevermore,
nature at it’s finest.
A rainbow on the canvas called
Earth.

shadows of a broken past

bloggin after a long time..
its 2008, a new year, new aspirations, new goals
but then there are the
ol' heartaches, ol' memories, ol' pain.

"i know i deserve much betta, sum1 hu wants to be out with me n not just in the secluded areas wer ppl cant see us.i dont want to feel loyal to you and turn my back against others coz i know i aint worth that much to you. i wanna be able to put u in my past and move on but sumhow i don't and its not because i can't sometimes i think maybe just maybe i dont want to. weird.i dont know what i feel towards u. sumtimes i feel lik calling u up and tellin u dat i x want to be friends, i wan more than that, much more...but i stop myself before the phone rings at your end. i want to see the guy that u once were. not hu u have become coz this new guy seems to me like a put-on. a deliberately worn mask to hide ur self from what, i have no idea. i can rant on all nite but i know it x make a difference.ur the one who told me to stop talkin to you so you could be with your ex, will u ever be any different?why am i so attracted to you after all the heartache?this is the question i need an answer to. it hurts me to be treated lik any other girl, it hurts me to know that im just a hobby, it hurts to see ur indifference to me. on top of all it hurts to know that im also a reason to the pain i feel"

xxx shadows of a broken past xxx